Thursday, September 8, 2011

It was Guaranteed

So we’re at a new school and want to make a good impression on the school and it’s teachers. 

Of course, we’re just guaranteed to do the exact opposite. Isn’t there something about trying too hard.

On picking up E after her second day of school, the teacher makes a point of coming out to me just to touch base you know cause E had a meltdown over math.  AND…. the learning assistance coordinator and her would like to meet with us this week.  Ummmm, she’s been in school exactly two days and already she’s headed for learning assistance. 

It’s always hard figuring out how to respond to “we had a meltdown today” because after all I know exactly what those meltdowns are like and… somehow a part of me feels like it’s my fault.  If I had more patience, was a better parent etc. 

To top it off in the middle of the teacher talking with me, O decides to act up by climbing on railings and squishing J, to which I hear cries of “mommy, mommy”.  I try to stop O but there is no way he’s going to listen to me and as I try to pry his 4 year old hands from the bar… I’m struck helpless and hopeless of saving any sort of good impression I’d hope to foster.  … Because of course he wouldn’t listen and I ended up telling the teacher I better go, she agreed and walked away.  Oh yea.  While I continued to pry O off the bars.

Talk about embarrassing. 

All I can do is shrug it off, put it out of my mind and hope she doesn’t think I’m one of those ineffective parents that threaten a lot and never follow through.  Then again, I shouldn’t care what she thinks.  It is what it is and I know that I try my best to follow through on consequences. 

When I’m at home and it’s just me and the kids, I’m pretty confident about my parenting style.  When I’m out in public though and under the watchful eyes of others, I’m less than confident and worry that I’m not saying or doing the right thing.  Especially in front of someone I’ve just met. 

Then again, the fact that I can’t seem to keep the kids from acting up in public these days might just reflect that my parenting style at home isn’t working all that well.

Sigh… this parenting thing is not easy.

4 comments:

  1. I know you are so not alone. These children have minds of their own darnit. I hope you can get this event off your mind and get back to trusting your instincts!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Parenting is NOT easy, but it has its charming, awesome moments that get you through.

    I know just how you feel - when you want to make a good impression - and everything goes south.

    When we moved away 2 years ago (and this summer moved back- Hooray!)- I had more problems with my teens. I just told their teachers that the transition was hard. Their grandpa died after we moved back to be with him. I asked for a hand-up not a hand-out with their teachers to get them through the transition.

    Whatever you do, do NOT let them mis-label you child. Newness is HARD - and they should understand that.

    Hope it's better over the next few days!

    OOhhhh - and you know, parenting is ALWAYS changing, ALWAYS new things. It is not necessarily a graceful dance. Maybe learning to be dexterious - but not necessarily graceful, and NEVER giving up 'cause you just are so full of love you couldn't.

    YOU ARE DOING AN AWESOME JOB. Do NOT beat yourself up. Just get ready for the Tango with week!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Why oh why do our kids always act up when we're trying to make a good first impression???? I'll never forget the very first time I went to the park to meet up with a new Mom's group and Cole had a complete meltdown in the first 5 minutes. And when I went to pick him up to calm him down, he threw himself backwards and fell out of my arms and bonked his head on the concrete sidewalk. Needless to say, I pretty much cried the whole way home and never saw those moms again.

    I sooooo know where you're coming from! Parenting is not easy!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ahhh WHY do teachers/other women like to make moms feel inferior?!

    You are a good mom. You are doing the best you can.

    There. THATS what women all around the world should be telling eachother. Not judging others. And you shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

    Kids act up. It doesnt mean your not doing an amazing job. Keep your head up, mama!

    ReplyDelete

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