Saturday, June 23, 2018

I Choose Love - Parenting Autism

It was a quiet moment after dinner.  My youngest two were hiding off in the fort they had built behind the couch.  My oldest was working on a story on her computer and I was sitting reading.  Just a typical moment in our home when the younger two did or said something that annoyed the oldest.  Also typical was my daughter's response: "What the hell are you doing?"


We've been trying for the past year to get her to not talk like that.  Her argument - hell is not a swear word.  We disagree.  So I reminded her that that sort of language wasn't necessary.  She glared at me and as I looked back down at my book I could see that she mouthed or muttered something I didn't
quite catch but the sense was that it was pretty negative towards me.

Now when you're a sensitive parent, like I am, this kind of thing can be crushing.  It's been a struggle for more than a year now of her beating me up one moment to fierce loving hugs the next.

Welcome to being a parent of a hormonal teenage girl on the Autism Spectrum.

I did not engage her. I chose to bite my tongue.  Something I'm having to learn to do. This wasn't even a major interaction and was pretty minor in comparison of some of the episodes we've had.  Yet, as I sat staring at my phone, I couldn't help but look back to 5 or 6 years ago when not only was she a lot shorter but I was also her whole world.  Love wasn't a roller coaster of conflicting emotions.

Monday, May 21, 2018

Using Essential Oils for Teens

Teenager - Yes, there's an oil for that!

I am a parent of a special needs kid who also happens to be a teenager.  Some days it's hard to know whether I'm helping the special needs kid or the teenager.  Some days it's both.  I don't blog a lot about my child's special needs.  It seems like it would be an invasion of her privacy as you can never really get rid of stuff on the world wide web and you have no idea when one day it's going to come back and bite you in the butt.

Regardless of special needs or not, today's teens have it hard and face an incredible amount of pressure.  Not only are they preparing for their future, but they have to make it through some of the most awkward times of their lives.  Throw in hormonal changes and it's no wonder they are over-stressed and tried.   

I thought I'd share some of the essential oils I use to support my teenager.

EMOTIONS

We all have emotional ups and downs and this is really something teens struggle with.  They’ve got a lot going on and a lot of pressure.  Sometimes they just need a little extra support to make it through the day. 

One really great oil for this is JOY

Thursday, May 17, 2018

6 Quick Tips for Organizing Your Kitchen

Studies show that a chaotic home can often result in a chaotic brain.

I believe this to be true.  The more clutter my husband and I have allowed into the home the more stressed out I am.  Why is it so hard to let go? I just don't know.

But I can't stand the clutter any longer.  The mess is driving me crazy.  A good friend of mine has inspired me to begin this mission of decluttering my home.  Even if it's just one small box at a time.

So this past weekend - I worked on just one room - The Kitchen.

Here are my six tips for tackling the kitchen:

#1.  Go through your cupboards, dig way back into the deepest darkest corner of your cupboards and bring out all those items you rarely or never use.  If your Great Aunt Martha gave you that hideous vase and while you may love your great aunt but hate the vase -don't hang on to.  Let it go (as Elsa would say).  The rule of thumb is if you can't actually recall having used something in the past year - it's time to let it go.

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

I feel Pretty - Amy Schumer's New Movie


I went to see Amy Schumer’s new film – I Feel Pretty last night with some girlfriends.  I haven’t laughed so hard in a really long time.  Despite some of the cringe worthy embarrassing moments Amy's character gets into – the movie’s message really rang though.

It’s about a woman named Renee struggling with insecurity.  She has a bad fall and is knocked unconscious.  When she wakes up from the fall she sees herself different, believing she is the most beautiful and amazing woman just like those other “hot” girls.  Her new confidence causes her to live fearlessly until she realizes that there was no change in her appearance. 

Afterwards, we talked about what our favourite bits of the movie were and we all agreed that we’d love to be more like “Renee” – we want to pull off the confidence to be who we are unapologetically without a concern in the world for what other people think.

What stood out the most wasn’t about body sizes or looks but how that confidence is really what you need.  You can accomplish a whole hell of a lot with simple confidence.  If you believe it, those around you will too.

Too often we feel that we’re not enough.  That there is something lacking in us.  Whether that’s because of media or society or both, I don’t know.  I mean how did we get here?  Who decided what the standard of beauty is?  You would think with all the actresses speaking out against the Hollywood Beauty Standard that things would be changing.  But nope, you still see the fit, toned and often dangerously thin models selling us bikini’s and cars alike.  Sure, you’ll read about the backlash over an edited photo but guess what – editors are still editing the photos to fit that “beauty standard”.

It's not about size, it's about your health.  What looks healthy on your body can look like death and disease on another.  As I keep telling my girls - it's not about your weight, it's about your health.  How do you feel in your body.  Is your body doing what you want it to do.  Don't get caught up in the numbers or the sizes.  It definitely has not been easy trying to coach my vulnerable teen through the landmines of store sizes.  

So, thank you, Amy Schumer, for rocking your slightly above average body, for being confident in who you are and standing up for women everywhere!  PS:  thanks for making it only pg-13 so I can take my teen to it.